Levy, There's an App for That!
July 9, 2011
What Paul needs to answer his Lord's Supper problem is the new iPastor app, available for download to smartphones and iPads. Here's the sales pitch from the ad in this month's Reformed Man Today:
Embarrassed by meeting your pastor in town and realizing he hasn't got the foggiest who you are?
Fed up of calling the elders for advice and listening to a recorded message that begins with `Your membership is very important to us......'?
Tired of having to phone the Librarian at Westminster Theological Seminary for emergency pastoral advice because your pastor's scheduling secretary is fully booked till 2013 and he's not available till 2015 at the earliest?
Worried that on your deathbed there will be nobody there from the elder board who knows your name, address and that you haven't been feeling too well just recently, to be able to comfort you?
Fret no more! Download the iPastor app today and have a pastor with you 24/7, rain, shine or conference season!
Features include:
Voice recognition: iPastor never calls you `Dave' if your real name is Richard, Michael, or even Barbara!
Instant pastoral advice: just enter your problem in the search engine and get results in seconds not years!
Lord's Supper on the go? Not a problem, sir!. Just place the elements on your phone screen for an instant consecration! (Catholic app not yet available)
And upgrade to the iPastor deluxe and get live skype streaming from a real live pastor (or prerecorded inspirational message) for your deathbed comfort/confession*
* Special data rates may apply; no guarantee of the pastor or even denomination of your choice.
The iPastor: virtual pastors for real people; imaginary solutions for real problems.
Embarrassed by meeting your pastor in town and realizing he hasn't got the foggiest who you are?
Fed up of calling the elders for advice and listening to a recorded message that begins with `Your membership is very important to us......'?
Tired of having to phone the Librarian at Westminster Theological Seminary for emergency pastoral advice because your pastor's scheduling secretary is fully booked till 2013 and he's not available till 2015 at the earliest?
Worried that on your deathbed there will be nobody there from the elder board who knows your name, address and that you haven't been feeling too well just recently, to be able to comfort you?
Fret no more! Download the iPastor app today and have a pastor with you 24/7, rain, shine or conference season!
Features include:
Voice recognition: iPastor never calls you `Dave' if your real name is Richard, Michael, or even Barbara!
Instant pastoral advice: just enter your problem in the search engine and get results in seconds not years!
Lord's Supper on the go? Not a problem, sir!. Just place the elements on your phone screen for an instant consecration! (Catholic app not yet available)
And upgrade to the iPastor deluxe and get live skype streaming from a real live pastor (or prerecorded inspirational message) for your deathbed comfort/confession*
* Special data rates may apply; no guarantee of the pastor or even denomination of your choice.
The iPastor: virtual pastors for real people; imaginary solutions for real problems.
