The Ministry of Presence

Chaplain Mike Gilson in the Spiritual Care Service unit of San Diego’s Kaiser Permanente Zion Medical Center shared about his visits with a Vietnamese patient and husband who both spoke little English.  The wife had terminal cancer, but later on to the chaplain’s surprise while doing his rounds he learned she seemed to be rebounding.  He rejoiced with them.

Sadly, not long after he saw them in ICU.  A blood clot was in her lung.  Later that day he encountered the husband screaming while throwing his body over his wife who had just died.  The new widower then stumbled out into the hallway and squatted in bereavement against the wall. 

In respectful silence, Chaplain Gilson—towering over most at 6’ 5”, sat down beside the diminutive heartbroken man in his mid-40’s who then crawled onto his lap and hugged him hard while weeping harder as the doctors and nurses walked past them expressing with tears their gratitude that he was there for him and for them.^[1]

This story profoundly illustrates the overarching chaplaincy principle of “The Ministry of Presence,” of going out into people’s lives where they are.  It is an example for all ministers, Christians, and parents to emulate wherever the Lord has us within the lives of our brethren, neighbors, and children.

A very important Bible passage that prioritizes the ministry of presence is Matthew 25:34-40, where Jesus teaches that when Christians show up to serve the physical vulnerabilities of the least of His people in greatest need they serve Jesus Himself.  This text addresses all Christians and ministers.  May we all “Have the Ministry of Presence of Body.”^[2]

In their book, The Work of the Chaplain, Paget and McCormack explain:

It is amazing how often a counselee will remark to the chaplain, “I don’t remember what you said.  I know it made sense at the time.  All I really remember was that you stayed with me.” … The ministry of presence is often undervalued.  The sick wait for visitors, the lonely delight in company, and the fearful take comfort in companionship … ministry of presence is sometimes the most important intervention chaplains provide.^[3]

Naturally, the ministry of presence of person needs to involve our whole person: “Presence is both physical and emotional.”^[4]  Once there in body, people often need to talk things out and receive comforting counsel.  Jesus says in John 10:27, My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me.  Christ’s sheep follow Him because they are familiar with His shepherding voice.  So we must also “Have the Ministry of Presence of Mind”^[5] to say something meaningful when we have the opportunity as we “Have the Ministry of Presence of Body,” mindful of Proverbs 25:11: A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in pictures of silver. 

Alan T. Baker, in his Foundations of Chaplaincy, drives home the same philosophy that must encompass all Christian ministry and witness: “More than anything else, chaplaincy is being present among those you serve: crying, laughing, worshipping, celebrating, mourning, storytelling, and comforting.”^[6]  Yet he reminds us that “Comfort often comes not in the answer but in the safe presence of one who understands the question … [the] loudest message may be through the silence of simply being present, still, and available.”^[7]  Further, “Too often we have a need to produce and perform instead of practicing a non anxious presence”; what’s more, quoting Anne Lamont, “Your there-ness … can be life giving, because often everyone else is hiding.”^[8]

One correctional prison chaplain recalled how, after visiting with an older inmate, “he abruptly turned around and with a smile on his face, he said, ‘You know, I’ve been incarcerated for fifteen years, and you are the first staff person to shake my hand.’”^[9]  Similarly, a hospital chaplain received a letter from a local pastor who benefited from his being present to care for his wife with cancer and him with his loss of her: “You are gifted at being the hands and feet of Jesus to those in need … an incredible blessing.”^[10]

Presence is paramount and powerful at such times.  Every pastor knows how the saints so appreciate his presence during hospital visiting hours but especially when he takes advantage of his unique access to the pre-op room to pray with them before surgery.

Dr. Jim Carter, Executive Director and Ecclesiastical Endorser for the Presbyterian and Reformed Commission on Chaplains and Military Personnel (PRCC), conveys how a military chaplain serving in the Persian Gulf watched eight or nine different shepherds call out their flocks from one mixture of about 90 animals, with their own sheep coming straight to each of their unique voices always heard closely speaking to them.

Dr. Carter also relayed querying a sergeant major of what makes a good chaplain, who quipped, “Easy.  If the soldiers know your voice at night when they can’t see you.”

Similarly, Dr. Michael Stewart, PRCC’s Associate Endorser of Civilian Chaplains, in his “Intro to Chaplaincy” class at the Reformed Presbyterian Theological Seminary shared about how a solider painted this picture of the ministry of presence: “What I need of a chaplain is someone who knows my name in the middle of the night when its cold and wet and he’s out there with us instead of being back in the comfortable officer’s quarters.”^[11]  This is just like Jesus the Good Shepherd of the sheep, who also went out of his way to go to Samaria in John chapter 4 to be near the woman at the well and initiate and carry a conversation to help her look at and inside herself—so that she looked to Him for the water of life.  She and many of her fellow villagers were saved not only by His incarnation’s sacrifice but by His words in person.

One military chaplain spoke about how a serviceman he was counseling texted him in ways that made it obvious suicide was imminent.  After driving forty minutes and yelling his name into the air where he thought the man might yet be breathing, upon hearing his chaplain’s voice the man paused from hanging himself and came out of the woods to him there and went with him to a hospital to get help.  The chaplain’s presence saved this man’s life—it was set up earlier by being present in his life.

Chaplain Gilson of Kaiser Zion said that there have been numerous testimonies from people who were in a coma that they could still hear—just as many caring for loved ones in home hospice know from nurses that hearing is the last thing to go so keep speaking to them lying silent on their deathbeds.  One healed “miracle man” patient who made local news testified to Gilson that while he was in a medically induced coma not expected to recover, “It brought great comfort to me to know my family was there—I could hear them speaking and feel them stroking my hair.  While I could not understand what they were saying, their voices were like sweet music in my ears.  So comforting.”

Presence also opens the door for words.  And words can make a world of difference, even when one can’t confirm a person is listening.  Gilson told of a lady also in a medically induced comma for three weeks.  When they extubated her, the medical team thought she’d need to go to comfort care, a place where patients have their symptoms and pain managed when there is no obvious cure and often while nearing end of life.  He would sit with her and pray for her but he also talked to her about his life, wife, children, grandchildren, and their weekly Friday fellowship dinners.  Upon one visit, he was the first to notice she had opened her eyes and alerted the nurse who with many others ran in shocked to see her awake and aware. 

Chaplain Gilson couldn’t stay, but when he stopped by the next morning, she was sitting up eating.  He asked, “How’s your breakfast?”  “Good.”  Then, he asked, “Do you know who I am?”  She said, “Yes, you’re Chaplain Mike.  You visited me a lot.”  Having been in a coma, how did she know?  He kept talking to her by her bedside and in some way, she heard. 

May we care enough to be there and “be there” ministering to people in chaplaincy, pastoral ministry, and Christian service and parenting—listening, tracking, engaging, and counseling, all to communicate that we truly care about those being cared for by our presence of body and mind.

Grant Van Leuven has been feeding the flock at the Puritan Reformed Presbyterian Church in San Diego, CA, since 2010.  A bi-vocational pastor, he also serves as Site Manager of the San Diego office for World Relief Southern California.  Grant and his wife, Fernanda, have eight covenant children.  He earned his M.Div. at the Reformed Presbyterian Theological Seminary in Pittsburgh, PA.